Tag Archives: Abortion

It’s the Little Things

Nothing is ever gained by reading the comments.

I’d like that inscribed my gravestone. Or on the plaque marking the tree growing out of my remains.

It never fails. Read an inspiring article or personal account or harrowing experience, maybe something I relate to on a deeply personal level. Feel validated or vindicated. This person gets it. I’m not alone in this thought or philosophy or experience. Just don’t read the comments.

Don’t do it.

You’ll regret it.

Well, the ones I can see are all positive so maybe I’ll just scroll down a little…

Damnit. I hate people.

It’s not just the Trolls. Those are easy to pick out. Look at me! Making libtards/snowflakes/sjws/whatever fight me in the comments is the only way my tiny dick gets hard. NOT ALL MEN! WHOO!

The non sequiturs are annoying. I didn’t read the post, but I fully agree/disagree for a long paragraph that has nothing to do with anything. Please validate me because the cats don’t cuddle me as much as I thought they would.

It’s tragic that you lost your baby months before it was born, but we prayed really hard and our friend’s daughter didn’t have a Down Syndrome baby so it’s a good thing they didn’t abort.

The “I support you but not how you express yourself/protest” comments.

The “that’s not how I handled a dissimilar situation” comments.

The “My story is so much worse, let me prove it” comments.

I think, after much consideration, the worst comments are Dismissives.

Yes, it is awful that some stranger harassed you on the subway and women face this blatant disrespect EVERY DAY, but get over it because there are starving children in China. I hope you’re happy that we don’t live in a country were female genitals are ritually mutilated and you’re allowed to leave your house without a male escort.

I’m sorry that your rapist went unpunished, but there is an island of trash in the Pacific and 16 species of bee went extinct in the last ten minutes. So, you know, get over it.

Ok, yes. There are a lot of problems in the world, but how exactly does pointing that out help? Does snidely tacking on #firstworldproblems when people are harassed or bullied or triggered make anything better?

It’s such a little issue in the grand scheme of things, why did you waste the time to complain?

Well I say, eff that jazz. When you’re hurting, you may think it helps to remember that others have it worse. Well, it doesn’t. Your pain is unique to you, there’s no scale you have to measure up to before you qualify to feel pain or anger or fear. “You must be this traumatized to ride the Shitty Life Roller Coaster.” Bull. Shit.

We are all trying to get by. I’m trying to save the planet by ditching straws and buying package-free products and recycling bottles and paper scraps even though I know I can never make up for the sheer magnitude of 100 years of industrial waste. And everything I do to help the environment is usually just as bad as not helping. (Like buying a hybrid or electric car to reduce my carbon footprint only to find that building and shipping that car caused so much pollution that I’d have to drive it for 1000 years just to break even.)

I’m hoping to raise my son to treat all people with respect, even while judges refuse to hold grown men accountable for raping preteens because they took money from him so they were the aggressors. And women saying it’s better to thank a catcaller because ignoring them can cause escalation from friendly flirtation to murder, even though catcalling is totally harmless. And people are more pissed off about aborting dead babies and kneeling athletes than black kids being shot for wearing hoodies.

How am I supposed to protect my son from toxic masculinity if you think it’s what bought him his freedom? How do I explain Conversion Therapy and 22 veteran suicides a day? How much damage will I have to undo when you tell him that boys don’t cry? Don’t be a pussy. That’s gay. Man up. Remember, son, your problems are insignificant, so stop bitching and go chop some wood and threaten to rape a girl because she’s playing a video game.

How about instead of telling a girl that a random stranger yelling that he’d totally fuck her is a compliment, we tell boys that catcalls are a threat? And asking for a hug is a subtle way of reminding women that if you wanted to, you could rape her behind a dumpster and leave her for dead because you have great swim times.

To return to my point, it is an ugly world out there. But we aren’t going to fix it by pointing at the ugly and yelling at people to get over their issues. If we don’t fix the little problems, we’re screwed.

To quote the late great, Aretha Franklin: R-E-S-P-E-C-T

That means you don’t treat people like things. Even if you disagree with their politics. Even if you feel attracted to them. Even if you can’t see their faces. Stop responding to criticism with insults. Stop adding to their suffering to make yourself feel more important or righteous. Stop blaming victims for their abuse. Just stop being assholes. Don’t be a pretentious twat waffle. Why is that so hard?

Maybe if we start respecting people again, we can start respecting other things.


Filed under Ramblings, Rants

The Best Way to Make Me Angry

Picture this.  You are sitting in PSY210 (Human Growth and Development) and the teacher is going over everything you need to know for the test, which includes an entire chapter she didn’t go over because of a family emergency.  You are exhausted because you stayed up way too late writing your blog and doing homework and stuff.  You are not in any way in the mood to eff around.  You are frantically trying to write down everything the teacher is saying as she wobbles unsteadily from one topic to the next without any coherent direction.  Then someone interrupts the review on the periods of gestation with the comment, “I don’t understand how it’s legal to murder babies,” or something similar (I can’t exactly remember because I didn’t write it down at the time.  I was a little shocked.)

Now, it’s not that I don’t love me an ethical debate.  I am quite fond of taking up the opposition on anything regardless of my actual views.  It’s something I’m good at.  What I don’t love is when someone makes a blatant comment that simply dares you to disagree (and the tone she used strongly suggested that no argument was expected and anyone who disagreed was a witch).  It wasn’t a question.  It was a demand to agree with her or be brutalized for being absolutely, unequivocally wrong.  What, pray tell, is the teacher, to whom this woman was addressing her “question,” supposed to say?  “Yes, of course you are right.  Let’s go henceforth to Washington and declare this profound truth to those stupid politicians so that they may reverse this evil!”  The teacher did try to deflect the question and get back to the topic, which had nothing to do with abortion (nowhere in our review was a section called “When to abort your unborn child).  But the woman would not be deterred and continued on for a few minutes, speaking over anyone who tried to offer an opinion on the topic and generally, pissing off those around me who were actually hoping to glean some useful information out of the class.

What did I say, (mostly to myself)?  “Are you effing serious?”  There is a time and a place to bring up deeply controversial topics for open discussion.  In the middle of a test review is not one of them.  There is also a way to open a discussion that doesn’t involve blurting out something in a confrontational tone to a classroom full of people who don’t necessarily disagree with you.  And if you are going to start a discussion, maybe pretending like there is a counter argument will facilitate conversation rather than making everyone feel awkward because you asked a question that doesn’t have a straight forward answer in a tone that demanded just that.  What she wanted to hear was her own opinion obediently recited back at her to reaffirm her own self-righteousness.  And that kind of attitude is one of the best ways to make me angry.

Now, had she been actually asking a question in a civilized manner and with an open mind, I could have given her several answers.  A)  Science is unable to determine when life actually starts (meaning, not just fertilization but when a being becomes sentient).  I do not like this argument really because it’s weak, to be frank, and it contradicts my personal beliefs.  B)  There are plenty of incidents when abortion is the better option.  When the pregnancy is a threat to the life of the mother and/or the child, for instance.  Some might argue that you should try to have the child anyway, but I think that should be up to the parents (not just the mother).  Again, that is my opinion.  I don’t think abortion should be used just because the mother is unfit (mentally insane or a drug addict, etc) since the child can always be put up for adoption (though from what I hear about the system, they might be better off with their druggie mom).  C)  It’s the mother’s body and she can do with it what she will.  I don’t like this argument either (as it clashes with my beliefs).  However, not everyone is of my beliefs.  That’s not to excuse them, but merely to point out that there are other ways of thinking.  The thing of it is, if a woman doesn’t want her baby, she will find a way not to have it.  That means everything from a rusty coat hanger to a dumpster behind the school to selling it for more drugs.  I would rather have to child humanely euthanized (I hate using that phrase here) by a trained physician than suffocating to death in a dumpster.  And there’s the added bonus that for those idiots who think abortion is birth control, they’ll probably be unable to carry a child to term when they do feel it’s the right time.

I’m putting myself in the path of some pretty severe criticism with this, I know.  The fact of the matter is, I don’t like abortion.  I know it is necessary in extreme cases (medical emergencies), but that doesn’t mean I condone it’s use.  I think it is an appalling practice that I will never resort to (unless it is an extreme case, which I pray to God never happens).  However, like many things in life (just about everything, in fact) I can only speak for myself.  I cannot make you think like I do or believe what I believe and I wouldn’t want to.  Making someone do something is just delaying the inevitable moment when they rebound in the opposite direction because it is in our natures to rebel.  Which is why, when someone asks a question which isn’t a question in a tone that demands compliance, I end up square on the other side defending a woman’s right to slaughter her unborn progeny.

Interesting side note:  Anyone ever notice how the strongest opponents to abortion are also the strongest supporters of the death penalty?


Filed under Ramblings